SoftThistle Life

How freeing it must be...

Autism, LifeMarylinComment

 

...to be able to fully show your emotions, at all times. 

Like my lil Max does. 

When he's happy, he's happy with his whole body! 

He smiles, he shrieks and giggles with laughter, he wiggles his bum and jumps about. 

You really can't help but join in when he's happy.

By the same token, when he's frustrated, or angry, or sad... he gets to let it all out. 

All of it. 

He can scream his head off, and throw things, and sob and it's ok for him to do this (though admittedly, it's not particularly enjoyable for any of us) because he has autism. 

He's always much better after a meltdown too.

If he's been having a difficult day, you can guarantee that a meltdown is coming, and that he'll have a wee sleepy spell after it, and then be right as rain. 

Just like I *need* to be able to vent to my mum, my friends, or even twitter to get my frustrations out and move on from them, Max needs to do the exact same thing. 

Like stamping his feet when he wants something and I tell him no.

(disclaimer: No idea where he got that from... can't possibly be an ingrained instinct that he got from his mum from what she used to do as a kid... not at *all* ahem...)

Or if he hurts himself, it's the end of the world and he'll sob and sob.

****

The thing is, when you're dealing with that amount of sheer emotional energy, it can be difficult to stop. 

Difficult to get yourself out of it. 

I'm pretty sure most of us have cried ourselves to sleep at least once in the past. 

I know that, when I was suffering from post natal depression, the only way I could escape was by eventually falling asleep, once I was all cried out. 

So it's hardly a surprise that when Max goes into a meltdown, it's hard to get him out of it. 

It's hard enough for a grown adult, so why on earth would it be easier for him? 

Especially when he has no speech, little understanding of what's being said to him, and no real concept of now, later, or then. 

****

 But still... however hard it is, it must also be such a release to be able to just let all that emotion get out on a regular basis. 

Instead of letting it eat away at you, which is the "allowed" thing to do in our society.

Because showing that you're anything but happy is a weakness. 

Or at least, that's how so many people perceive it. 

Yes... I think it must be quite freeing to be Max sometimes.