Or should that be made to realise?
I haven't been spending enough time with the boys during the day. They NEED me to play with them more, and instead, I'd been spending time online. BAD MOTHER.
Today I didn't touch the computer till after the boys were in bed.
Oh! My! God!
The difference in them was amazing!
I felt much calmer because I wasn't feeling pulled in so many different directions all at once, or feeling guilty that I should be doing something else.
Zack wasn't being a naughty little git, he was happy because... shock horror... I was spending time with him.
Max and I had *so* much fun playing with a table mat of all things!
I must have sat on that kitchen floor putting it on my head and letting it fall off for about an hour. He found it absolutely hilarious, and... AND(!!!)... he started saying "I got it!" whenever he managed to catch it. His own little way of saying it, but still - he was saying it!
Zack and I had a great time playing with the bongo drum that we have (thank you Dean's big sis, we love his birthday pressie! hehe) and had such a laugh making different beats up, banging it in time to nursery rhymes, and generally just being very noisy.
We played that "trust" game. You know the one where you have to let yourself fall backwards and trust that you'll be caught? He loved it. Not only will he trust me to catch him, he now trusts Dean too. I was so teary eyed when he finally let himself fall back for Dean to catch him. Of course it then included lifting him up and spinning him around in circles! ;)
We had a great day today, all because I wasn't always nipping back to the damn computer all day long.
I think I'm going to try to stay away from online stuff until they're in bed from now on.
As soon as I go on just to check something little it ends up leading to something else and something else after that... you know how it goes, right?
So from now on, if you see me online before my kids should be in bed - shoo me away, ok?
Life is much better when I'm actually living it instead of constantly checking up on what's going on in my online world.