So, Twatface wanted to talk about access for the boys today… he thinks that I should get them to Inverness , so that he can pick them up from there for the weekend, and then get them back down to perth, for me to pick them up there.
He’s livin in a lil dream-world I think. Inverness is a good 2-3 hour drive away, but I don’t have a car so you’re talking easily 4 hrs on public transport with a 4yr old and a 2yr old (he is staying with his family who have a total of 3 cars).
Not to mention that Max’s deaf and is about 8 months younger in his capabilities, and he has seen his father a maximum of 3 times in the past 7 months. I’m not so happy at the thought of him being so far away from me with people he, quite frankly, doesn’t know.
Apparently he’ll “need that written down” for some reason – I said that’s fine by me, I’ll speak to my lawyer about it tomorrow.
It’s not that I don’t want him to see or take the boys – hell I’ve given him plenty of room to breathe and suggested he come down regularly to see them, but he can’t honestly believe that I’m going to bend over backwards for him to take the boys for a weekend, when I’m not really sure that Max would be able to go anyway.
That ship has sailed imo.
I have a feeling this is going to be the start of the whole “battle of the kids” thing with him. He’d always said that if we ever split he’d “be taking the boys with him”… Don’t think so somehow, especially since he’s the one who fucked up numerous times and eventually cheated on me (again) and fucked off cause he wanted to get his leg over on someone else!
Grrr what a pleb.
So… hope everyone’s having a great weekend! 
{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }
What a numpty.
It’s a bit rich for him to have basically ignored the boys for months, then suddenly demand you go out of your way to accomodate him. If he wants to see the kids, there has to be a better form of “meeting in the middle” than he’s proposed.
Surely the grandparents would want to see their grandchildren occasionally, right? And they are the ones with the cars. So they could bloody well drive down and pick the kids up – it’s not fair to suggest you take two young children on long, public transport trips.
My thoughts exactly^^ Quite frankly, he knows it’s never going to happen, I guess he’s wanting to make me out to be the bad guy who doesn’t want him to see his kids. I would *love* for him to take them for a wkend every month or something, but unless he can pick them up and drop them off again, it’s simply not going to happen!
As far as I see it hun, he made his bed, he can lie in it. He’s the one who did wrong by you and his boys and the one who should be proving he is capable of arranging things for himself. What he is asking is just rediculously out of order.
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That’s what I thought! Think it’s probably his parents’ influence tbh… if only they knew what he was really like. :S
what an ass..
thats so not fair for you..
i agree on the transport and with Max too.
good luck at the lawyers hun..
hugs
Thanks hun *hugs*
uh, yea – hell no. he needs to drive all the way if he wants to see those boys!
Thanks, and from a father’s perspective, that’s good to hear!
I would like to smack him about, I think.
He can’t have everything.
He can’t cheat and lie *and* have a family too. He just can’t and he can’t expect you to do all the work either.
If he wants to be a father, he needs to step up to the plate, bugger expecting the plate and the cake to come to him.
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You’ve taken the words right out of my mouth m’dear!
I almost wish he could read this thread to see what an idiot he is making of himself… almost.
Oh honestly, what a prize wanker. As has already been said, he needs to prove he’s capable of sorting some things out for himself and as for expecting you to travel that far with the boys and then leave them with virtual strangers, he’s obviously living in cloud cuckoo land.
He’s the one that left you, he can come to you and visit them.
Goodness, that’s got my blood boiling!
Good luck with the lawyer today. I’ll be thinking of you.
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Thanks hun – got me pretty riled up too! >_<
Oh yes, and I also meant to say, why now? Who’s prodded him? Because he hasn’t done this off his own back, not if he’s left it until now.
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I’m guessing probably his parents… they’re the usual suspects when he actually gets off his arse to do something.
what a load of sh***! I say good luck to him and let him go and see how far he gets trying to make a four and two year old travel to inverness no court is going to let that happen!!! normally what ive seen is that the father travels to the children to pick them up! duh! xxx
Thanks Sarah! I’m glad I’m on the “right side” of this, makes things a little easier that’s for sure.
Being fully aware you don’t have a car I don’t understand how he can think you’d take two children on public transport for 3-4 hours. I just don’t understand this guy at all. I’d like to think in his heart he has the right motives but his brain isn’t thinking it through to accomplish it. He had two kids with you the man needs to grow up I know you stepped up and were the grown up.
You’ve hit the nail on the head there – he really does just need to grow the hell up! Mind you, he couldn’t do it for his children, so I don’t think it’s going to happen tbh.
Twitter: SleeplessNights
October 20, 2009 at 5:23 am
Oh honey, I’m so glad you’ve got a lawyer. I agree, I don’t think Max would be okay with him, he’d be scared and confused and it wouldn’t be good. Plus, why should YOU have to bend over backwards to help him out?
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