Am I really going anywhere?

I mean, really, I guess I'm the only one who can answer that, and right now, I'm not so sure I know the answer.

I love my inspirational quotes, goodness knows if you follow me on Pinterest, you'll see just how much! 

I'm always good at giving advice, but it seems I'm not so good at taking it at the moment.

"Your desire to change must be greater than your desire to stay the same." 

Therein lies the problem.

I want to change - to get fitter, oh how wonderful that would be!

To make a dent in the laundry would be a plan right now to be honest.

I don't have the drive, the inclination, the want or need to change. 

Things are coasting along pretty well for us at the moment, and it's been pretty nice to have things being boring and predictable. 

I forget till people remind me, that my life isn't necessarily the easiest. Single parent, two young boys, Max's autism, his lack of sleeping (which MIGHT be getting better... he's slept all night through for A WHOLE WEEK NOW!!! That's me jinxed myself now, of course), not getting a chance to slack off and have someone take over.

I still do slack off though, it's just, that ends up meaning I get behind, simply *because* there's no one there to pick up where I left off.

And then, I don't really know how life is going to go. Particularly with Max. 

He's attempting to talk, when prompted, most of the time. 

However his speech is still very limited. 

Probably that of around a one year old. 

Someone who's just starting to learn how to say a few words here and there.

But he doesn't have the *need* to communicate with me in the way most children do with their parents.

Still, he's getting there. My beautiful boy.

I have no idea how much he's going to need me though, as life goes on. You know?

So.

Am I selfish to want to spend my evenings playing games, or watching tv, and generally not doing things to "better" myself with? 

I know the answer is really no. 

But I still feel guilty when I do something I enjoy, instead of something productive.

I should be learning something, bettering myself, doing some blasted housework. 

GETTING ORGANISED, basically. 

Which is something I am truly and utterly hopeless at.

Maybe it's time I looked for a PA... 

any takers?

Sometimes you just need some time out! 22/366

So last night, once the boys were tucked up in bed? That's exactly what I did! 

I spent my entire evening immersed in a story about dragons and people with magical powers who were oppressed and need me to help them.

In other words...

I gamed my little heart out! (Dragon Age 2, if you're interested!)

It was great fun. 

I think it's something I may need to do once a week. 

I don't often spend long on games, though I love to play them. 

There's too much else to be done! 

I took the above photo last night, just before going to bed.

And this one was taken while typing this out...

This would be my now broken (and replaced... dear god, me not having a keyboard is like having my arms cut off!!) keyboard, with the culprit. 

The little bugger saw Zack's milk this morning and decided that the best way to have a drink would be to knock it all over the damned keyboard. 

I didn't realise this until about 3 hours later, when I attempted to log into my mac and got something along the lines of "asdlisudfvbnsdmf -[w90845290whnef vksj h" instead of an 8 character password. 

Goddamn cat!

Happy Gamer Max 15/366

My happy lil Max is in love with the headset I put on the iPad so he could listen to music while playing games on my iPad without it driving me to distraction!

That's my boy!

Sundays are usually a day for a walk if the weather is nice enough, but it's absolutely freezing out there today, so instead we're having a gaming day.

I remember the freezing air affecting my asthma when I had it bad as a youngster, so I don't want to risk the same with Max.

The wee man has been playing The Sims on the iPad.

Zack has been playing a combination of Sonic Generations on the Xbox, and Angry Birds.

Me? I've been playing SWTOR (Star Wars: The Old Republic, for the uninitiated. It's an online game. AWESOOOOOME).

Oh.

OHHHH.

AAAAND.

Max actually SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT!!!

On a SUNDAY!!!

This is UNHEARD of!!!

I didn't have to get up until he started jumping around on my bed at half past 9 this morning!

My expression when I realised the time this morning was very much like Max's up there. 

Only with a slightly more just-woken-up look to it. 

*happydance*

Time to go back to playing SWTOR. 

Or maybe Skyrim.

I haven't had an arrow to the knee for a while...